I have been told by countless people that they "can't
sing", are "tone deaf" or that I "wouldn't want to hear
them sing". I know more people who
are convinced that their singing voice is a lost cause, than I do people who
are happy with their singing voice; and I am sure of one thing:
You only really believe you can't sing because somebody once
(or repeatedly) told you that you can't sing and shouldn't sing.
Your mum told you.
Your teacher informed you. Your
best friend forbade you.
How very DARE they?!
How dare someone take such a pleasurable thing away from you!
Now don't get me wrong, I am not saying that you should
immediately go out and make an album or go on X Factor (not that the quality of
singing there is very high anyway). That
reaction would be part of the culture that I described in my "Open Letter
to Dave Myers" which says people should either not sing at all, or should
be on talent shows. Singing has many
uses, only one of which is for performance.
In most cultures and in more traditional parts of the UK
singing is primarily a community activity.
People sing together for enjoyment.
It is only in our strange celebrity culture that we have decided that
people who are good should be marketed, and everyone else should watch silently
(unless they are drunk of course, in which case anything is acceptable).
I have spent hours trying to convince some of my good
friends to sing for me and have often been able to give them the wonderful
news that their voice isn't half as bad as they thought and has loads of
potential. Some of them have even started to cry as they told me of the harsh words that were
said to them at a young age which have imprisoned their voice ever since. If a child is told not to sing then they never
get the chance to develop their voice and so don't learn to control it –
leading to the huge numbers of people who "can't sing".
If anyone wants to get really good at singing it may take
hours and hours of work. My message is
not that a beautiful singing voice is easy to obtain. If you have never had the chance to learn to
control your voice, it will take a lot of work; but it is usually possible.
Only 2-5% of the
population are actually tone deaf. This
means about one in fifty people cannot actually hear the difference between two
notes and often will not enjoy listening to music. For these people learning to sing may not be
obtainable. But you are unlikely to be in that 2%.
Now my actual point is not about learning to sing
professionally, starting a band, or going on The Voice. Singing is not ultimately about success and
fame. Singing is something that we do
together, that brings us together, that we use to express social and political
points, that we do for our children, and that we use creatively and
enjoyably. And people, NEWSFLASH: you do not have to be "good" to join in these activities and enjoy them! If the majority of people
refuse to sing because they were humiliated as a child, then we lose this
powerful activity which is part of who we are as human beings. About the only place in cities in the UK
where singing as a community activity still regularly happens is in religious
communities (and football stadiums!), and even there the singing is becoming
weaker and less enjoyed.
So do me a favour.
Never ever tell a child not to sing. In fact, actively encourage them to experiment
with their voice. Don't tell them to go
on a talent show unless they are genuinely good because they will be humiliated,
but do not take the pleasure of singing away from them. I sang in a church choir as a child and was
allowed to sing countless shy solos before I learnt to master my nerves and my
voice. I was allowed to learn and
improve. Nobody told me not to sing even
though I'm sure I was no child-star.
Do me another favour.
Give the metaphorical finger to the people who told you that your singing
was horrible/ghastly/painful, that you should never sing, that you
"shouldn't give up the day job" (sarcastic, but cutting), or that you
should leave singing to other people.
Tell that voice in your head where to go, and enjoy yourself! If you want singing lessons be prepared for
hard work, but go for it. Make sure you
tell the teacher what your aim is so they can give you an honest opinion on
whether it is obtainable (you might just want to learn to control your voice a
bit better).
And one more favour. Pass
this message on to your friends who are ashamed of their own voices. I would love this to be a country which
re-found its voice. I know that for me
singing is a place where I escape for a while and where I feel closer to those
around me. I would love that to be your
experience too.
Yours la-la-la-ingly,
Blanched Almonds
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